It is most exciting thing for me to tell of myself things about me to you. Please continue.

I am local to provincial town of Voronezh in Russia. It is great city and meny people like it. I have been unofficial tour guide in this city for 10 years and I look forward to sharing my home town with you and your incredulous family.

I never study English in official capacity do you understand as I was student at most important Voronezh technical institute for tram drivers. I am very pleased for my most excellent education received at there. My greatest experience in tram driving means I know my way through the turbulent roads and passages of this most beautiful of beautiful cities very well. Today I drive Lada, I am looking to buy for myself a skoda fastback soon. Then I will be more reliable tour guide for you.

I love the foreigners who sit upon the cushions of my seats in my car to show them all that I know about history of this town and you may feel free to even take photos with the photo camera you have as I pilot you around the place. Perhaps if you like I can stop the car by pushing with my foot upon pedal which controls the breaking system of notoriously Lada.
To me there is so much more to speak to you about myself. So climb on board and the journey of your lifetime can start get going. My friend cannot believe my English tongue. I watch meny American movies and love watching them on my video player.

I would like to have big business empire. Very soon my brother will not be in the prison and he can be my employee. So it will be that I will have another member of my team to show you good times of Voronezh. My business will grow super fast then, he is very cool guy and know lots of businessmens. I think I will have good times for my tourist guide business perhaps I can then add another town to my credentials and when my five year plans has completed my company will be bigger in five years. That is my plan. You are probably thinking to yourself hey this guy knows his beans he has big plans. You would be correct. So you know I am best tour guide for you and your nice relatives because I am like meny westerners who are always thinking about the future imperfect and not how to live today.

Just as I am to write about myself I get excited. The future for Anton will be sunny. This is my opinion. Thankyou for your enjoyment in reading about my plan.

Forgive me, I must tell more about the great city of great Voronezh. Big thumbs up go out to beautiful architecturalists who designed magnificently tremendous structures which can to be seen dotting the place here and thereabouts. If you read about myself and think to you that you like what you are seeing on the page you be reading then I would like to give you my itinery. Please read the instructions following with care.

Arrival
You will arrive in Voronezh on an aeroplane I don’t know the time but you will tell me. My telephone number is printed on local newspaper and I have business cards in places where many people go. Included like the post office or maybe library. Many people can tell how to get them to you.

I will meet you and you will say to me hello you must be Anton Petrovich. I will say to you yes come with me. I do not know what you are called by name but you tell me when we make our special business arrangements. I warn you meny meny taksi mens will be at airport, but you must wait with utmost longsuffering for me to enter building and be your only guide. Other taksi mens will try and take your bags and hands to shake like they have important contract with you. Do not go. Very important to wait. I will come for you. As you see I have lot of advice which to you will be finding helpful.

We will go very fast in my car because I am one of best drivers in beautiful Voronezh. If you like you can move my windows up and down independently with the winding devices put in car at factory buy highly skilled Russian workers. People say Lada cames from Finland. They lie.
As we drive towards my home where I give complimented food you will be all consumed by wonder at this unspoilt historical gem. I will tell of all my knowledge about my home and when you are lucky to stop and breath the air so fresh in this place it will give big appetite for meny foods and drinking. My wife Olga will preparing food over the stove for the special guests who have come to visit. It will be you.

You will have experience of real people. Russians are very pleasant hosts. You find that is true. My wife work at local canteen on the university. She is great cook I am pleased to have her make my acquaintance for many years now about 16. She will cook special Voronezh plates which you and your family must eat as our guests. I hope you like me eating meny potato plates and foods which have in them some meats. We have much toast because we are very happy you find me at airport or maybe you will to arrive in train in firstclass and if that is true we will be happy you have seen me at the train station. Maybe, my other familial relatives who are in the vicinity will be pleased to come and begin acquaintancing with you. They are great at party, my uncle Sergei maybe will bring to us his drink which he makes himself. It is like vodka, but with more oral burning. It will be seen to be beleivable.

Thanks be to you for given me pleasure to tell of my great plans. Will you please check for when I can update you in future coming. In meantime we say nazdarovye.